Living in Vancouver sometimes feels like a dream. Like a drama movie where improvisation is part of the script and every scene has a plot on itself. I wake up before sunrise, riding my bike through streets where the concrete is covered with rose petals and there’s majestic walls of pink flowers above. In the silence of the morning I’m only an observer, the watchful eye taking in the views without having to interfere.
Then I’m at work and it’s full on speed, I’m running around preparing food and dealing with customers, the smell of coffee is now so familiar it doesn’t penetrate through anymore. In between the multitasking I congratulate myself for being good at my job, until a second thought comes trying to diminish it.
It’s the beginning of the afternoon still and the sun is high, I’m off and on my bike the city looks so lively and enchanting. I see smiles and laughs and feel the happiness reflecting on the mountains and the sea. How fortunate are we to have such views everyday. I prepare crafted food for the pleasure of it, the kitchen in my home springing with possibilities and scents, and when the man I love crosses the door my heart is so full as our plate on the table. We bike downtown and join dance groups on the street, faking hip hop battles in public and letting the beams of buildings and cars be our spotlights.
The sky turns from orange to pink and then black, the sweat on our bodies being cooled by the wind, and on the way home our bodies settle with the darkness and sea. Life feels so complete and right, and full of magic in its simplicity.
Then the winds change, the sky becomes grey for days and there’s a storm inside my head. I feel everything and everything is too much. There’s so many thoughts I can’t believe on them all, but somehow they are still there. I find myself lost inside, loving so much but incapable of feeling loved. Being rocked on bed I tell my lover of all the things that torment me, and through words they seem a bit smaller and less powerful. He kisses my back and prays in gratitude for all the blessings we have, and we ride through dreams into temples and peace.
Life is not always easy, but is always full.